In an interview with 'More' Fran Dresher opened up out being the victim of a home invasion and rape. Here is her interview...
Aside from your successful career off camera, you have been through the wringer.
FD: I have had my downs. My life has been about very high highs and very low lows. Out of the depths of despair, though, came a silver lining, and from that I gained insight. I was then ready psychologically to grow as a human being. There have been many life lessons as well as consequences I had to learn.
More: Such as?
FD: When I was a rape victim, I was not in therapy. I was trying to be the superwoman and sweep it under the rug by not talking about it to anyone. It was a tabloid TV show that talked about the rape like it just happened when it fact the rape happened years before. The show even tried to talk to my rapist at the jail he was in. That story sent off alarms with people I knew everywhere. It was then I felt my feelings and really experienced it all over again. It was also at that point that I realized I needed a therapist to deal with those internal feelings I hid for so long.
More: How did you deal?
FD: You need a lot of help after that. One of three women will be raped in her lifetime. I hope for the other victims out there that they have a support group or a good husband like me to support them. I feel bad for women who alienate themselves like I did.
More: When you were raped, Peter was in the room.
FD: Yes. He was tied up, blindfolded and gagged.
More: The police caught the guy?
FD: Yes. We were lucky in that they apprehended the men who were brothers and on a rampage we were the victims of. We lived, survived and moved on.
More: How do you cope all these years later?
FD: I live defensively. I am much more aware. It took me a year to not feel like a shattered mirror. You heal, but you don’t forget. It leaves scars that never go away. But you learn to get happy and laugh. I feel so blessed that my job allows me to laugh, especially when I am being creative.
More: You told Larry King in a past interview that there was a silver lining to that horrific experience of being raped.
FD: Learning how to feel my feelings was a big growth for me. Initially I hid my feelings, and that was both bad and unhealthy. I now feel I am a more rounded human being. It also made me appreciate my husband more, especially after we had sex for the first time after the rape. In my first book, there is an entire chapter about the rape. Many women at book signings will come up to me and ask me to autograph that chapter because it helped them deal with their ordeal, too.
More: So you found the silver lining?
FD: You have to turn lemons into lemonade. I am not glad it happened, but shit happens, and what we do with it makes all the difference in life. You know, holding down those feelings might have contributed to my getting cancer.
More: Why would you think that?
FD: Holding those feelings from a major trauma inside as well as a person’s lifestyle and genetics I feel can contribute to possibly getting cancer or at least increase your chances of possibly getting cancer. When you don’t let your body feel horrific pain, it manifests itself to something else. Your emotions, lifestyle and well-being play a significant factor in your overall health.
I love reading out survivors who turn their misery around! Be strong, be bold and keep fighting!
STRIKE.DANCE.RISE
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